2006 was not a good year for me. Probably evident in the low blog volume. And, honestly, the lack of knitting volume. Anyone like a list of FOs for 2006?
I spent the largest part of 2006 depressed. Don’t want to get out of bed, crying at the drop of a hat, life is miserable depressed.
I’m feeling a great deal better now, most of the time. I have wonderful friends who push me into taking care of myself. I have a great psychiatrist, and now an equally good therapist. And I have a loving family. (Yes. Yes I am tearing up while writing this. I’m so grateful for you all).
Not every day is better. I still have times where I don’t want to do anything, but they get less and less. Honestly, the thing I want to say most is this: If you are suffering from depression, or know someone who is, find a good doctor. I’ve seen a psychiatrist before, but not one that I really got along with, and that really hurt my progress. I spent six years with the worst parts of my problems undiagnosed, and on an incorrect dose of medication.
Something else that’s important to me: You hear stories of the horrors of anti-depressants. I’m not doubting they happen, honestly. But something I don’t think is often heard is when they help. Too often someone tries one (if at all) from their family doctor, has a side-effect, and gives up on the whole class of medication. Please, don’t, if you need help. The first one my family doctor put me on was awful for me. However, now that I’m on the correct dosage of the proper medication, it’s amazingly different.
I don’t want stigmas to interfere with anyone feeling better. You wouldn’t feel guilty about having the flu, you shouldn’t feel ashamed of mental disorders, either. So, to show I’m not ashamed, I’ll disclose my own issues.
For the longest time last year, agitated depression ruled my life and made everything else seem minimal. However, under that I have agoraphobia and obsessive-compulsive disorder. But I can and will learn to live a good life, even if it’s hard. There’s no reason not to.
For anyone. It just takes help. And there’s always someone out there willing to help. It’s scary to take the first step, but it gets better. Trust me.
*hugs all*
If there’s anyone out there still reading, there will be knitting content next post. Including my first FO of 2007, and my current WIP. Excited?